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The Mother Test

I [a mother] was out walking with my 3-year-old daughter. She picked
up something off of the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I
took the item away from her, and I asked her not to do that.

"'Why?" my daughter asked.

"Because it's been on the ground: You don't know where it's been; it's
dirty and probably has germs," I replied.

At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration and
asked, "Mama, how do you know all this stuff? You are so smart."

I thought quickly, then answered: "All moms know this stuff. It's on
the Mama Test. You have to know it, or they won't let you be a mama."

We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was evidently
pondering this new information.

"Oh. . .I get it!" she beamed, "So if you don't pass the test, you have
to be the dad."

"Exactly," I replied with a big smile on my face.