I've read quite a bit, but I've come to no solid conclusion on the matter. My predicament is mainly that, I consider myself to be a muslim and I try to follow the deen to the best of my ability. But I seem to fall into both major and petty sin often - this led me to believe it was my lifestyle, the 'typical' British university student. Thus, I stopped doing the obvious things and I removed myself from clubs and pubs, I no longer hung around with a crowd that consumed hash etc etc. I've managed to successfully remove these aspects from my life, however, during these dark days I met a member of the opposite sex and a relationship began. She isn't a muslim rather a Christian, but with her help my deen slowly improved and she has actively encouraged me back into Islam - I could perhaps go as far as saying, without her maybe I wouldn't be in the position I'm in now. This then brings me to the next predicament, I could possibly see her converting to Islam upon marriage happily however, she would not consider converting anytime soon as she is also at university. Obviously this is a major problem as the relationship is haraam within Islam. However, I simply cannot manage to live without her and I have tried extremely hard to, I spoke to an imaam and he said to trust in Allah, which I did, but I find myself returning to her over and over despite how much it wrecks me with guilt.

This brings me onto the next issue - salat. I do not intentionally forget salat, whenever I remember I pray, however the issue is remembering, it just doesn't stay in my mind. For instance, for Fajar prayer I have set alarm after alarm, but I have never managed to wake up for them. I do not consider myself to be missing salat through either delinquency or laziness as I intend to pray as often as I can a day. Again, whenever I forget and remember I pray and I feel a tremendous amount of gilt.

I'm at a loss with regards to both these issues..